Relationship Advice #4

Advice #4: Be willing to do things that your partner enjoys, and also be willing to do things you enjoy without your partner.

I don't know of any two people who like ALL the same things. Whether it's movies, sports, music, or the outdoors, there is probably some area that you and your partner do not share an enthusiasm for. It's important to compromise, of course, but I think it's wrong to compromise by giving up something you love, or by doing something you truly hate.

If you love to swim, but your partner hates it, should you stop swimming? Should your partner do it even though they hate it? No to both. If you enjoy the ballet, but your partner thinks it's boring, well then they should compromise by coming sometimes anyway - boredom isn't going to kill you. If they won't though, go anyway! Do what you love to do, and then sometimes do what you don't love to do but do it with the person you love.

My husband loves his soccer team and has season tickets. I don't care for it, but I'm happy to go and enjoy being with him while he enjoys it. But he also likes to swim in the open water and ride a motorcycle fast. Both of those activities actually terrify me, so he has to do that without me.

I enjoy live theater, while my husband could easily never see a show. But he goes with me. On the other hand, I like to hike and lift weights, and he has chronic injuries that hurt him before too long. So I have to do that by myself or with someone else.

That's compromise. Just watch out for the "compromise" that makes you give up altogether the interest or hobby your partner doesn't also enjoy. Don't let parts of yourself die away. Don't be afraid to do things alone or with another person.