Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Day 28 of Gratitude: My Kids


I'm almost done with this month of Gratitude Reflections, and it would be wrong to end without talking about my children.

There has been a bit of conversation in the last few years about studies that show that having kids decreases happiness for the parents.  But then there are new studies that critique the old studies, and you can read more about that question here on Jezebel.

So, am I glad I had kids because they make me happier?  I like Gretchen Rubin's observation that having kids isn't happier on a day-to-day, moment-to-moment level, but that it is part of how she "feels right".

My children were dearly wished for.  And yet, they are not what I imagined they would be.  Who was it that said that in order to love the child you actually have that you will need to mourn and grieve for the imaginary child you carried around in your head for 9 months?  (I think it was Mr. Rogers.)  Well, for me that is true.  They are not my creations, not my imaginings, not what I expected.

And they're perfect just the way they are.

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